Life Subtracted

"Logan's Run Eats Soylent Green"


Anthony Cresswell has just been promoted.


After ten years coasting through life as a junior accountant, he is finally moving up in the world...all the way to the Subtractions department.


Unfortunately, thanks to extreme government measures taken to curb the ever-rising population levels, it is the Subtractions department’s job to subtract people rather than figures; all of societies underachievers are singled out, and forcibly reminded that their great sacrifice will make room for others.


For his first assignment Anthony Cresswell is given the task of subtracting himself. Needless to say, he’s not dead keen.


He goes on the run, pursued by every gun-toting government assassin in the city, with a secret buried deep in his mind that could either save or destroy mankind.


He just needs to survive long enough to find out what it is...

The Last Of The
Navel Navigators

What if you had the power to open portals to other worlds at the click of a bellybutton…but every time you did so, you risked being eaten?


Discovered in a swamp and raised by hillbillies, Jellybean 'Gator Bait' Skratcher leads a sheltered life, until one day he accidentally tears a hole in the fabric of the universe, whilst attempting to remove fluff from his bellybutton.

He’s whisked away on an epic adventure across hostile worlds teeming with ravenous demons, mischievous beard pixies, and deadly hunchback cooking, all the while led by a scatterbrained stork who's made it his mission in life to deliver Jellybean to the right parents, or die trying.

But when your best friend's a goat, and your greatest hope for survival relies solely upon a talentless magician who can’t even do proper card tricks, nothing is likely to go as planned!

Grynbad And 
The Seven Soups

​Timmy Grynbad has bad teeth, and a big heart. So when his beloved grandpa's most magnificent false teeth get stolen by a great green Gribble Grobble, he responds in the same manner as any dutiful grandson would; he leaps headfirst into a barrel of custard and sets off after them.

Emerging in a strange land of liquid, Timmy soon discovers he must cross the Seven Soups and face its many hazards.

Along the way he will battle lolly-loving pirates, wrestle with mermaids, haggle with trolls, and learn to run on custard. But such tasks pale in comparison to the dangers that await him in the foul reeking depths of minestrone!

Will Timmy sink or swim? Find out inside this fully illustrated self-contained fantasy adventure, which is sure to appeal to fans of Roald Dahl, the Mr Gum series, and Wallace and Gromit.

Praise for Grynbad: " Wacky - Weird and one of the best children's books for 7-9 year olds I've read in a VERY long time." - Linda Jones, 5 star Goodreads Review.


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© 2018 by David Hailwood.

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